9.02.2004

Think Geek

If you are in the computer industry, and the Dilbert cartoons on your desk calendar show a recap of what you experienced personally yesterday, check out thinkgeek.com to make yourself feel better. They have a fun range of t-shirts. Here were some that made me :-):

  • No, I will not fix your computer
  • There are 10 types of people in the world; those who understand binary and those who don't
  • Obey gravity. It's the law!
  • SELECT * FROM users WHERE clue > 0 (or) SELECT * FROM users WHERE clue=TRUENo rows returned
  • There's no place like 127.0.0.1
  • Practice Safe Hex & Avoid Computer Viruses Today
  • How many people can read hex is only you and dead people can read hex? 57006
  • WYSIWYG Babydoll
  • Insufficient Memory
  • resistance is futile if <>
  • Generic Humanoid Carbon Unit
  • You are dumb v 1.0
  • Will work for bandwidth
  • Skillset Exportable. Insufficient ROI. Office of Employee Termination and Overseas Outsourcing
  • PEBKAC = Problem Exists Between Keyboard and Chair
  • ID-ten-T error
  • There's no place like ::1
  • I don't work here
  • $>man woman$>Segmentation fault (core dumped)
  • Go away or I will replace you with a very small shell script
  • Scan my network and die
  • I read your email
  • Bow before me, for I am root
  • /(bb[^b]{2})/
  • kung foo
  • esreverreenigne
  • Chicks dig Unix
  • Perl gerl
  • I wrote code so you don't have to - O'Reilly
  • 200 OK403 Forbidden
  • Got root?
  • I TCP/IP, but mostly IP
  • Procrastination - Hard work often pays off after time, but laziness pays off right now
  • I brake for LAN parties
  • Achievement - You Can Do Anything You Set Your Mind To When You Have Vision, Determination, And An Endless Supply Of Cheap Labor.
  • Potential - Not Everyone Gets To Be An Astronaut When They Grow Up.
  • Teamwork - A Few Harmless Flakes Working Together Can Unleash An Avalanche Of Destruction.
  • Ambition - The Journey Of A Thousand Miles Sometimes Ends Very, Very Badly.
  • Meetings - None Of Us Is As Dumb As All Of Us.
  • Motivation - If A Pretty Poster And A Cute Saying Are All It Takes To Motivate You, You Probably Have A Very Easy Job. The Kind Robots Will Be Doing Soon.
  • Idiocy - Never Underestimate the Power of Stupid People in Large Groups.
  • Apathy - If We Don't Take Care of the Customer, Maybe They'll Stop Bugging Us.
  • Consulting - If You're Not A Part Of The Solution, There's Good Money To Made In Prolonging The Problem.
  • Indifference - It Takes 43 muscles to Frown and 17 to Smile, But It Doesn't Take Any To Just Sit There With A Dumb Look On Your Face.
  • Mediocrity - It Takes a Lot Less Time and Most People Won't Notice the Difference Until It's Too Late.
  • Cluelessness - There Are No Stupid Questions, But There Are A Lot Of Inquisitive Idiots.
  • Despair - It's Always Darkest just Before it goes Pitch Black.
  • Mistakes - It Could Be that the Purpose of Your Life Is Only to Serve as a Warning to Others.
  • Incompetence - When You Earnestly Believe You Can Compensate For A Lack Of Skill By Doubling Your Efforts, There's No End To What You Can't Do.
  • Elitism - It's Lonely At The Top. But It's Comforting To Look Down Upon Everyone At The Bottom.
  • Use the Best: Linux for servers; MacIntosh for graphics; Palm for mobility; Windows for Solitaire
  • A bad day using Linux is better than a good day using Windows
  • Have you applied your Windows security patches today?
  • The box said "Requires Windows 98 or greater", so I installed Linux
  • Department of Clue Enforcement
  • C:\WINDOWS C:\WINDOWS\GO C:\PC\CRAWL
  • You know you're an engineer if you have no life & can prove it mathematically.
  • When I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you
  • We have enough youth. How about a fountain of SMART?
  • Time flies when you are sick and psychotic
  • The universe is a figment of its own imagination.
  • The ozone layer or cheese in a spray can. Dont make me choose.
  • The beatings will continue until morale improves.
  • Quiet - Alpha Geek at work.
  • Press any key... no, no, no, not that one!
  • Preliminary operational tests were inconclusive (the darn thing blew up)
  • NEVER, NEVER question the GEEKS judgement
  • Make it idiot-proof, and someone will make a better idiot.
  • I PROCESS, therefore I AM
  • If we aren't supposed to eat animals, why are they made of meat?
  • I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet its hard to pronounce.
  • I can't be fired, slaves are sold.
  • ERROR: Keyboard not attached. Press F-1 to continue.
  • Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
  • Department of Redundancy Department.
  • Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...
  • Deja Moo: The feeling you've heard this bullcrap before.
  • Dain bramaged.
  • Chaos! Panic! Disaster! (My work here is done)
  • Blessed are the Geeks, for they shall internet the earth.
  • Alcohol & calculus don't mix. Never drink & derive.
  • 90% of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at.
  • I see dumb people
  • Roses are #FF0000/Violets are #0000FF/All my Base/Are Belong to You
  • Keep out of Direct Sunlight
  • 2+2=5 (for extremely large values of 2)
  • I see fragged people
  • Code Poet
  • #!/usr/bin/girl
  • All your base are belong to us
  • I see dead pixels
  • I hack my Mac

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